Labels~

You know what? While I was out for a power-walk and reverse sprints (yes, that's walking/jogging backwards... well, I tried but I keep going off track, ending up in people's yard!), random thoughts came to mind. Labels... What are they? Why do we have them? What purpose do they serve? What does that prove?

You're a male. You're a female. I'm a female. One is white. One is African-American. One is Jewish. One is Hispanic. One is Latin American. One is African-American. One is Scottish-Irish. One is an alien (really?!). Granted, it gives us an identity, yet why must one identify themselves? Your body, whatever sex you may be or whatever skin color you have (I hope it is not purple and yellow polka dots but then again, I would love to see that!), houses a soul that does not recognize the gender, race, color, etc. What we do to our body serves our soul, our spirit. Why must we separate ourselves?

Just recently, I received an email (via FB) from a friend who asked me a very good question... Am I crazy? Am I wild? Am I interdependent? Well, I am what I am, that I am. Why am I that? How can I explain? Again, there goes the labeling. We are so conformed to label, are we not? I admit, I'm independent (perhaps to the extreme)... Yet, interdependent? How? We all have a relationship with others. I believe in ONENESS. Allow me to elaborate -

INTER-DEPENDENT or CO-DEPENDENT
In the religions of the world, spirit is the concept of an innate essence of a being and the different religions embrace spirit in diverse ways. The spiritual wisdom among the diversity of the tribal cultures are identified with three common features around the world:

1. They are earth-based. The relationship between the earth and the people is one of interdependence.
2. The acts of daily life, birth/death, and nature are all endowed with deep meaning through ritual and dance.
3. Lastly, tribal cultures view all the individual things that make up the universe like rocks, trees, mountains, rivers, people, animals, etc. as being interdependent.

This interdependence is not just a physical dynamic but a spiritual one as well. Unlike the concept of human souls which are believed to be eternal and preexisting, one's spirit according to tribal wisdom develops and grows as an aspect of living interdependently with the community.

Healthy Relationships - Interdependent, not codependent

"One of the false beliefs that it is important to let go of, is the belief that we need another person in our lives to make us whole.  As long as we believe that someone else has the power to make us happy then we are setting ourselves up to be victims."

Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls by Robert Burney

Codependence is about giving away power over our self-esteem.  Taking our self-definition and self-worth from outside or external sources is dysfunctional because it causes us to give power over how we feel about ourselves to people and forces which we cannot control. 

If my self-esteem is based on people, places, and things; money, property, and prestige; looks, talent, intelligence; then I am set up to be a victim.  People will not always do what I want them too; property can be destroyed by an earthquake or flood or fire; money can disappear in a stock market crash or bad investment; looks change as I get older.  Everything changes.  All outside or external conditions are temporary.

That is why it is so important to get in touch with our Spiritual connection.  To start realizing that we have worth because we are children of God.  That we are all part of the Eternal ONENESS that is the God Force/Goddess Energy/Great Spirit.  We are Spiritual beings having a human experience - our worth as beings is not dependent upon any outer or external condition.  We are Unconditionally Loved and we always have been.

The more we can start owning the Truth of who we really are and integrating it into our relationship with ourselves, the more we can enjoy this human experience that we are having.  Then we can start learning how to be interdependent - how to give power away in conscious, healthy ways - because our self-worth is no longer dependent on outside sources.

Interdependence is about making allies, forming partnerships.  It is about forming connections with other beings.  Interdependence means that we give someone else some power over our welfare and our feelings.

By healing our emotional wounds and changing our intellectual programming we can start to practice discernment in our choices so that we can change our patterns and learn to trust ourselves.

As we develop healthy self-esteem based on knowing that the Force is with us and Loves us, then we can consciously take the risk of Loving, of being interdependent, without buying into the belief that the behavior of others determines our self-worth.  We will have feelings - we will get hurt, we will be scared, we will get angry - because those feelings are an unavoidable part of life. Feelings are a part of the human experience that we came here to learn about - they cannot be avoided.  And trying to avoid them only causes us to miss out on the Joy and Love and happiness that can also be a part of the human experience.

True magic of emotional intimacy can flower.  The sacred magic of Love is worth the effort.

Two people consciously working together can be a very beautiful experience.